296: Govern, Garden, Guide (And What To Do If You Missed It)
Podcast: Oh Crap with JamiePublished On: Tue Feb 10 2026
Description: I’ve been getting a lot of questions about govern, garden, guide — especially from parents worried they already messed it up.So let’s clear the air.In this episode, I explain:Where the govern, garden, guide concept comes fromWhat “govern” really means in the 0–6 yearsWhy leadership (not control) creates safetyHow permissive parenting sneaks in — and why it feels goodWhy kids don’t trust inconsistent boundariesWhat to do if you didn’t govern earlyWhy the pendulum has to swing before it can settleHow boundaries actually work (and what they are not)Why repeating yourself erodes trustHow to stop going “psycho” as a parentWhy kids push harder when leadership is unclearHow routines, rules, and boundaries work togetherWhy it’s never too late — but it will be uncomfortableThis episode is a reminder that:Parenting isn’t about perfectionKids don’t need you to be gentle — they need you to be steadyBoundaries aren’t about control, they’re about safetyAnd leadership is an act of loveYou didn’t ruin your kid.But if you’ve been too permissive, you’re going to have to get uncomfortable for a while.That’s how trust gets rebuilt.As always — put your phone down, rock on, and have a beautiful day.👉 Sign up for my newsletterJamie's InstagramOh Crap! Cafe Parenting CommunityOh Crap! Potty TrainingOh Crap! I Have a ToddlerPaleovalley Protein SticksTherapeeBrick for Phones(Save 10%)
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