When the Fearful Avoidant Realizes You're DONE TRYING, They Do THIS
When the Fearful Avoidant Realizes You're DONE TRYING, They Do THIS  
Podcast: The Thais Gibson Podcast
Published On: Fri Jan 16 2026
Description: Get 7 Days Free Plus Lifetime Access to Our Ending Codependency Course — Free Forever! Start Creating Relationships That Last. https://attachment.personaldevelopmentschool.com/dream-life-codependency-course?utm_source=podcast&utm_campaign=dream-life-codependency-course&utm_medium=organic&utm_content=pod-01-16-26&el=podcast When you finally stop trying… it can feel like everything suddenly shifts. And with a Fearful Avoidant, that shift often activates a powerful, and confusing, internal reaction. Understanding what actually happens inside a fearful avoidant when you’re done trying can give you clarity, closure, and the confidence to stop second-guessing yourself. 🎥 Episode Summary In today’s video, Thais Gibson breaks down the 4 major internal reactions a fearful avoidant experiences when they realize you’re truly done trying. You’ll learn why Fearful Avoidants often swing between distance and pursuit, how abandonment fears get activated, and why reconnecting doesn’t always mean they’re ready for a healthy relationship. This episode is especially important if you: Feel stuck in a painful push–pull dynamic Are trying to understand a Fearful Avoidant’s mixed signals Keep getting pulled back in after you start letting go Or are a Fearful Avoidant wanting insight into your own patterns ✨ Key Takeaways ✔ Why a Fearful Avoidant’s fear of abandonment activates when you stop trying ✔ The sudden shift from withdrawal into pursuit and what it really means ✔ Why pursuit doesn’t always equal readiness for commitment ✔ The nostalgia and reminiscing stage Fearful Avoidants go through ✔ How rewriting the story helps them emotionally shut down ✔ Why codependent patterns keep these cycles repeating ✔ How healing your attachment style breaks the push–pull loop ⏱ TIMESTAMPS 00:00 – What Happens When A Fearful Avoidant Realizes You’re Done Trying 00:58 – Fear of Abandonment Gets Activated 01:55 – The Two Sides of Fearful Avoidants 03:05 - Fearful Avoidants Will Swing Into Pursuit 03:40 - Fearful Avoidants Don’t Want The Relationship to Work Again 04:30 - How Fearful Avoidants Act When Their Fear of Abandonment Is Activated 05:25 - Fearful Avoidants Can Be Blind To How Their Actions Affect Other People 06:08 - Fearful Avoidants Might Feel Like Their Pain Is Normal 07:34 - When Fearful Avoidants Realize You’re Not Trying, They Start Reminiscing 08:53 - Ending Relationship Codependency & Enmeshment Promo 09:33 -  When Fearful Avoidants Realize You’re Not Trying, They Rewrite The Story Meet the Host Thais Gibson is the founder of The Personal Development School and a world leader in attachment theory. With a Ph.D. and over a dozen certifications, she’s helped more than 70,000 people reprogram their subconscious and build thriving relationships. Helpful Resources: 🧠 Take the Free Attachment Style Quiz https://attachment.personaldevelopmentschool.com/?utm_source=podcast&utm_campaign=attachment-quiz&utm_medium=organic&el=podcast 📚 Read the Learning Love Book https://attachment.personaldevelopmentschool.com/learning-love?utm_source=podcast&utm_campaign=learning-love&utm_medium=organic&el=podcast 🎧 Discover Podcast Episodes https://attachment.personaldevelopmentschool.com/podcast?page=1 📝 Read the PDS Blog https://blog.personaldevelopmentschool.com/ Let’s Connect on Socials: 📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thepersonaldevelopmentschool/ 📘 Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ThePersonalDevelopmentSchool 🎵 TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@thaisgibson 💼 LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/thepersonaldevelopmentschool/